Couch Cushions, Blankets and Lots of Love

Growing up I lived in a really great neighborhood. Next to our house was a side walk that led to path that led to an alleyway that led me right to my friend Kelly's house. A bunch of us would meet there and play kick the can or go a few doors down for a game of knockout. It was great.

One of my all time favorite things to do at Kelly's house, though, was to build a fort. Mr. and Mrs. Ferguson were so great with us tearing apart their game room for the purpose of those awesome childhood forts of couch cushions and blankets. Of course, I didn't appreciate it at the time, but now as a mom who is constantly reconstructing my own couch after the kids build one, I get what a pain it can be.

As a child, anything was possible in the security of that fort. I could be a princess in a castle waiting to be saved, I could the captain of a ship, steering my vessel through choppy water...the possibilities were endless. Watching my own children play and create, I see how valuable the days of carelessness and limitless possibilities are. Someday, they'll know that even the most beautiful princesses don't get to happily ever after without a lot of heartache along the way. Someday they'll realize couch cushions and blankets aren't an unpenetratable fortress, that the problems of life find their way in.

This is my hope, though. I hope that Joe and I are able to teach them that heartache will happen, but broken hearts can be mended. I hope they know that none of life's problems are bigger than their parents love for them. I hope they know that they might not get to be a princess, but they can be a doctor, or a meteorologist, or a mom or a teacher or whatever they set their minds to.

And I want them to remember, even when they are 31 and are frustrated as they put the cushions back on the couch for the umpteenth time, that while those living room forts can't keep those problem of life out, they can hold SOOOO much love in. Every once in a while, I think we all need to crawl into a fort and find that child that still lives within us!!!

The Quicker Picker Upper

Breath in...now out.

Let's see if I can collect my thoughts and emotions long enough to write a long overdue post! I wish I could report everything has been so wonderful that I haven't needed to write and find my "ah ha moments" on here, but sadly I have just been crazy busy and uninspired.

I took a blow yesterday with my original issue that brought me here to share and seek some sunshine, and haven't been able to shake that gray cloud that seems to be hovering above me since. No need for concerned emails and phone calls...I'm fine and will continue to be fine because I haven't lost sight of the blessings in my life. Being fine, though, doesn't mean I can't have moments of self pity and frustration.

We all know the way it goes, though. You feel down about one thing and everything else just starts going wrong. You get stuck behind a dump truck while rushing to pick your daughter up from preschool. (Sorry Ellsie Bells) Your 2-year-old finds your wallet and dumps it, leaving you scrambling to gather up the change before the baby eats it. (I made it just in time to pull the quarter from his little mouth) The dog runs in before you have time to clean off her mud covered paws, leaving wonderful little prints all through the kitchen.

And then, the pièce de résistance, I open the fridge to get out the milk to finish the macaroni and cheese for the three kids in the next room screaming for food like they had NEVER eaten, only for the 2-quart pitcher of Kool Aid to fall, soaking my jeans and sending a tidal wave of purple sweetness across the tile floor. In case the mess wasn't enough, the kiddies came running into the kitchen to see why mommy was screaming, stepping in the mess and spreading it further.

Back to breath in...now out.

I actually remained pretty calm, returned the kids to the family room and flipped on Ratatouille to distract them. I grabbed a roll of paper towels and began to soak it up, rushing to the grape flavored river about to travel under the fridge. As I tore square after square and watched as it soaked up my spill, I began to fantasize about mega paper towels that can soak up life's problems. Sure, these little squares are great for Kool-Aid and milk, but imagine such a simple fix for those curve balls life throws our way that we can't simply wipe away.

I guess in some way we do have that. It just isn't packaged and sold at Giant Eagle or Krogers. I guess when we have those gray clouds we need to look to the people in our lives to be our sunshine. We have to let the hugs that cover us from our kids, or spouses, or friends absorb our hurt and frustration. No, our problems won't just go away when we embrace the people we love, but sometime it makes the hurt hurt a little bit less, it makes the sadness a little easier to bare, and it reminds us that while love doesn't cure what ails us, it can carry us through till we're all better.

Now to make more Kool-aid and empty the trash can full of soaked paper towels. Thank you, Bounty!!!

Gated Houses, Open Hearts

A couple of days ago the kids and I jumped in the soccer-mom-mini van and headed out to fill up the gas tank then the grocery store to fill up the fridge. On our gas detour, we were stuck at a red light on a street we don't frequent. Next to the car was a large house with a gate in the drive way and a beware of dog sign. My oldest daughter, Presley, asked me why they had the gate and sign. I explained to her it was to keep unwanted people out. I explained that sometimes when people have a lot of nice things they need security.

Presley said to me, I bet you wish we had that house. I hesitated, and then began to explain how I feel. I don't wish that was my house. I am in a place in my life where I can in all honesty say I am completely happy with what I have. We have a house that while it may be overflowing with our endless amounts of junk, is also overflowing with love.

I told the kids that I have everything I could ask for, a husband and best friend who loves and respects me and four children who I love so much. My four-year-old daughter Elliot replied, "And your four kids love you so much." I wish there was a way to put the amazing way my heart filled when she said that. Someday, when they are parents, they will understand.

I don't spend my life pining for the material things some think will make thier lives complete. My life is complete at this very moment, and I believe it will only become more fulfilling to me as my family continues to grow in our love and appreciation of one another.

My happy thought for the day!

"Right now at this very moment we have a mind, which is all the basic equipment we need to achieve complete happiness."
-Howard Cutler