Puppies and Rainbows

I'm having a less than stellar day and really feel like whining, complaining and asking for pity as I bask in my misery. However, that would be the complete opposite of the mission behind my blog, so I'm sitting here hoping the screen and keyboard will inspire some puppies and rainbows from me. Waiting...waiting...

Okay, so it isn't magically happening for me. Maybe I need to try another approach to getting out of my slump. Maybe I need to find my own happiness on days that it isn't so easy. When I'm hungry I fix a grilled cheese and make myself not hungry. When I am sick I take medicine and make myself feel better. So why should feeling down be any different. I'm not magically full or magically cured, so why would I be magically happy?

I've battled depression for years. This is a concept my husband just doesn't get. He can't see the difference between being depressed and being unhappy. He always asks what I have to be so unhappy about. The reality is I am very happy in my life, very satisfied. I have four beautiful children, and a husband who I may not always see eye to eye with, but who I love very much and loves me in return.

I guess happiness is sort of like hunger. Just because you have food in the kitchen doesn't mean you don't get hungry. Just having it isn't enough. It is all what you do with it. First, you need to know you are hungry, figure out what you want, and then eat. Sometimes eating once isn't enough and you have to go back for more.

Just because there are great people and things in your life doesn't mean your life is all happiness all the time. It is what we do with our lives, it is how we treat the great people in it, and how aware we are of what we need...what we REALLY need to be happy. If we skip a meal, despite the food being right there in the fridge, we might get grumpy and pretty darn hungry. Likewise, if we don't take the time to enjoy the things in our lives that bring us that inner peace and joy, our souls will hunger for some happiness.

I don't really know where I'm going with this. I guess what I've gotten out of this rambling is that being happy with your life and where you are in your life doesn't mean you have to be happy all the time. (Does that even make sense?) Let me try that again...Even the happiest person can have blah days...those days where Ben and Jerry and a spoon are the only companions you feel like.

Hmmm...still no magical puppies and rainbows. Guess I'll have to resort to my standby!